21 Things you Only Know if You’ve Worked in Hotels

1) Much like prison it’s far easier to get into than it is to leave. 2) No room service professional ever enters a room without expecting to see someone’s knob. 3) Nothing causes the cold hand of fear to grip your bowels like a phone ringing on your day off. 4) Management’s idea of career progression differs greatly from your own. As does their concept … Continue reading 21 Things you Only Know if You’ve Worked in Hotels

Reasons to Drink Number Two: We Drink to Remember.

We live in a world that dances to a liquid soundtrack of alcohol, and it’s a beautiful if bitter sweet song ruined occasionally by a harshly discordant note that sounds a lot like someone falling head-first off a table, or projectile vomiting up the side of a completely defenceless building. Alcohol has the power to make life memorable, which is not always a good thing, … Continue reading Reasons to Drink Number Two: We Drink to Remember.

Drunk Experiments 1: Hangovers: We Road-Test Them.

There are many hangovers on the market, ranging in strength and complexity from ‘just grab a couple of paracetamol’ to ‘might actually have given myself a disease’. But with all this choice, which one to choose? To find out we conducted the following controlled hangover trials; drink nothing but the singular type of alcohol in question, achieve a level of drunkenness where you would happily hump … Continue reading Drunk Experiments 1: Hangovers: We Road-Test Them.

Liquid Sophistication – An ode to Cognac

Some products are irretrievably, unapologetically romantic; a smokey, single malt Scotch, a cold glass of crisp Champagne, a golden brown Cognac warming in the palm of your hand. Just like champagne cries out for a toast, or Scotch an impromptu Robbie Burns reading, Cognac demands something from you too; a moments pause, a little stillness in your world, a little reflection as you stare into … Continue reading Liquid Sophistication – An ode to Cognac

15 Reasons NOT to date a bartender

As a bartender I am no stranger to giving advice. At last count there were at least eight weddings, three divorces, two children born out of wedlock, five children born in wedlock and four very happy same sex marriages as a direct result of advice from your’s truly. So when I saw eharmony’s article this week on reasons to date a bartender I was of … Continue reading 15 Reasons NOT to date a bartender

Blue drinks – why they must be stopped before it’s too late.

  Society has zenith points; cultural high water marks which stand as testaments to our achievements as a species; the building of Notre Dame, the abolition of slavery, the filming of The Empire Strikes Back. Then there is the flip side, our dark underbelly of cultural shame; the fall of the Roman Empire, the Spanish inquisition, X Factor. This is just as true in the … Continue reading Blue drinks – why they must be stopped before it’s too late.

Where to drink in London in the event of a Zombie apocalypse?

  As a lifelong bartender I’m constantly asked for recommendations on where to drink in different situations; from mates over from Australia for the week, to upcoming Christmas parties. The question I am of course most often asked is; where to drink in London in the event of a major zombie apocalypse? And in fact, is it even possible to combine fine cocktails and ambience … Continue reading Where to drink in London in the event of a Zombie apocalypse?